Would you care to see my cucumber?

Overheard by Veggiegirl while working in a garden . . .

Woman: "Do they usually grow this big? I've never seem them this big."

Man responds suggestively: "Thank you . . . genetics."

(*They're talking about tomatoes)

Blame your parents

Overheard by Dotty at Dots . . . 

Younger salesgirl chatting with older salesgirl: "Is pneumonia genetic?"

More dirty dancing . . .

Overheard by Jenny in the bushes by the train bridge . . . "Stick it in me. 'Cause I love you."

The last dance

Overheard at an office . . .

Guy: "When I heard that Patrick Swayze died, my first thought was, 'Nobody puts Johnny in a coffin.' "

Momma's boy

Overheard by Brett in the men's washroom at Vangeli's Tavern . . .

Brett (noticing a button on the floor): "Looks like someone lost a button."

Drunk, possibly high, 50-ish guy at next urinal: "If I lost a button, I'd take it to my mom and say, 'Mom! Sew on my button.' And she'd say, 'Sew it yourself! Can't you sew your own button?' I'd say, 'Yeah, mom! I can sew my own button!' But that's just my mom. She's f**ked. She's 89."

That's doubly ignorant

Overheard by "Brett" at the Muslim tent, outside the Farmer's Market . . .

A woman picked up the Quran and asked her friend, "Is this one of Obama's books?"

Say . . . swastika!

Overheard by "Inappropriate" at a soiree where people are talking about inappropriate places to pose happily for pictures . . .

Man: I know someone that, when they were at Auschwitz they saw someone posing for a picture like this [*makes a huge grin and thumbs-up*]

Woman #1: Really?!?

Woman #2: It's not like you are going to the happiest place on Earth.

Man: Yeah. It's like, 'You've just won Wimbledon! What are you going to do now?' . . . 'I'm going to a concentration camp!'